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  • Grindhouse
    • Grindhouse
    • Runtime:127 min
    • Release Date:2017-01-16 08:00:08
    • Director: Robert Rodriguez
    • Genres: Action, Thriller
    • Studio:


Grindhouse? What the hell does that mean? Is this even something I'd
enjoy? A typical moviegoer would say ask those questions. One who's
typical night out includes seeing a high budgeted film in a theater
with anti-sticky floors, nice leather seats, and viewing the cinematic
experience in the finest audio and video presentation possible. Not to
mention, one who's spending a mere ten bucks on a late outing with a
soul film, that typically, doesn't deliver what it promises. Grindhouse
is exactly the complete opposite of that. Grindhouse is typically
defined as a double feature, in which two B-flick films (oh no, you
won't find a DeCaprio here) play back to back, while trailers serve as
the intermission. Not to mention that grindhouse experiences consisted
of those annoying product placements and how heavily they emphasize on
a restricted rating. As for people that know what a Grindhouse is and
misses the experience they once had, well folks, here's your chance!
Step right up and pay your ten bucks for two films, fake trailers,
"restriction" cards, and a restaurant advertisement. Don't go in
searching for the latest Hollywood actor, some fancy set pieces, or a
clear picture and chances are, you'll probably have a fun time.

THE MOVIES ____________

Planet Terror: ***1/2 out of (****) or 8/10. Basically, this film has a
copy-and-paste script since the plot is paper-thin and it involves the
usual, "virus breaks out and people get infected" concept. However,
that's what makes this film more overall effective. Planet Terror is
the first film to be featured in the double-bill and rightfully so. The
performances are top- notch, the pacing is brisk, the body count is
plentiful, and it's just boatloads of fun. How can you go wrong with a
Fergie cameo, a Quentin Tarantino cameo, Robert Rodriguez in the
director's chair, severed balls, a go-go dancer with a machine gun for
a leg, and her Mexican companion? Planet Terror is the finest B-flick
I've seen because Rodriguez proves to us that even though your film is
intentionally bad, that doesn't mean it has to have weak dialog or
characters. It can have great characters, some funny one-liners, and a
brisk pace added to the mix. Highly recommended.

Death Proof: ***1/2 out of (****) or 8/10. Okay, I know many will beg
to differ with me putting both movies on par with each other, but let
me ask you this. How is it fair to say one film is better than the
other when both films are in two entirely different ballparks? If you
want a break-neck pace, a "get-to-the-point" direction, and hardcore
thrills, see "Planet Terror". However, if you ask for a little more
character development and a rather smoother pace, seek out "Death
Proof". Honestly, this film is underrated. I mean, yes, there is a lot
of redundant dialog, but I was entertained and that twenty minute car
crash sequence even made me like this movie more. I can't really say I
liked one film over the other. Both set out to do what they wanted and
succeeded greatly.

THE FAKE TRAILERS ___________________

Machete: *** out of (****) or 7/10. You've just *beeped* with the wrong
Mexican! That's just one out of many cheesy moments. From a badass
Mexican to a three-way pool scene to a priest with guns, this will
quench the thirsts of avid B-flick fans. While I liked the faux
trailer, it loses a star (or three) because it didn't keep my interest
as the others did, but it was still good.

Werewolf Woman Of the S.S.: **** out of (****) or 10/10. No lie, I
absolutely loved this trailer. I mean it truly showcases how such of a
douchebag Hitler was, a nice campy tone, and a Chinese Nicholas Cage.
Can this get any better? Apparently so since I gave it a terrific

Don't: **** out of (****) or 10/10. This trailer or Thanksgiving was my
favorite, even though I love Werewolf Woman Of the S.S. I've always
been a sucker for haunted house films and slashers and when I found out
"Don't" was a mixture of those, I jumped with joy. Seriously, Edgar
Wright is a genius. If this becomes a movie, I'm seeing it.

Thanksgiving: **** out of (****) or 10/10. By the next sentence, you're
either with this trailer or not. A knife to the vagina, A swallowing
woman who's boyfriend's head is later decapitated, a turkey stuffed
with dead bodies, a man humping a dead body filled with turkey, and a
dead poor Grannie. Thanksgiving is a wet dream for B-flick lovers. The
picture, the voice-over, the money shots. It's all there.

OVERALL EXPERIENCE _____________________

Grindhouse: ***1/2 out of (****)

Overall, Grindhouse is one hell of an outing. Two nearly perfect films,
flawless fake trailers, and corny product placement make this a solid
recommendation. If you are wondering folks, I saw the WHOLE thing. From
the opening "Machete" fake trailer to the credits of "Death Proof", I
have seen Grindhouse in its fullest. This could not have happened if
the sweetie pies over at Vivendi Entertainment didn't release their
Grindhouse Blu-ray. Rodriguez and Tarantino, please, please, make
another Grindhouse flick!!


I gotta admit the reason I went to theaters in order to watch this back
to back feature film was cause one of the film "Death Proof" is
directed by Quentin Tarantino. And to my surprise I enjoyed watching
"Planet Terror" directed by Robert Rodriguez more. It just had that
exploitation film feel to it and was more entertaining to watch all the
outrageous and zombie mayhem that happens on screen. "Death Proof" on
the other hand is a self indulgent film, which I usually don't complain
about but when I first watch it, it was pretty dull. With it's endless
dialogue that wasn't that intriguing or interesting, and Tarantino is
known for writing some amazing and immersive dialogues. The second time
I watched "Death Proof" though I got to appreciating the film a bit
more. So yeah "Planet Terror" started out with a bang and was just
great to watch some of the crazy stuff on screen although some stuff
just didn't make any sense and was really random. But that was how
horror/exploitation films were like, even if this film had a budget of
$53 million, when those grindhouse theater films was a lot cheaper. I
also liked how it purposely has the damaged and aged effects in the
film, the unconventional techniques made it feel like your watching one
of those exploitation/horror films from the 70's well at least sort of.
In theaters I wished the movie had intermissions, yeah it has fake
trailers where you could go take a break and not miss the movie parts,
but I really wanted to watch all the fake trailers as well. As a double
feature film, it really is worth the price of admission. But if you
separate the film and if it wasn't a back to back double feature film,
than it's worth just renting it. I don't know how many of the fake
trailers is going to be a full feature films. Since "Machete" is now a
full feature film and all, but looking forward to other ones as well. I
am also glad Quentin decided to become a director instead of an actor,
cause he is just a terrible actor although his cameo was somewhat
interesting. The other actors and actresses that shows up for the fake
trailers and both the movies or at least a cameo was a pretty cool idea



While I consider myself an avid movie fan, I did not enjoy this movie
for several reasons.

The pointless stupid little things thrown into the movie for what
seemed to be no reason whatsoever (IE the strippers making out in the
back room, the using a grenade launcher as a jet-pack, the fact that
each of these friends in a seemingly small town just happened to be
immune, the rude attitude of the sheriff toward the 'hero', the utterly
stupid fact that somebody's genitals were dropping off in a midst of an
attempted rape), that these same directors seem to do in A lot of their

It just makes me scoff, and makes me think that these directors are
less mature than the children they hire for their parts.

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